Bayonetta

5 Responses to “Bayonetta”

1. Chuan Yang says:

   March 11, 2010 at 10:46 pm

   Fxxk Sega for being bone idle in porting this game to the PS3. They could have done a better job than releasing the PS3 version of this game with long and normal load time, screen tearing, and inferior graphics. Not everyone has a M$ xbox 360…
   Rating: 3 / 5
2. Marella says:

   March 11, 2010 at 11:19 pm

   Dear Sega : Why does this game have a female protagonist? Women shouldn’t do anything outside of cooking and shopping. In this day and age you’d reflect people would know by now. Bayonetta shouldn’t even be fighting. She should be at home looking pretty and making babies. Marella understands that the gaming is not meant to be taken seriously but Bayonettta is reprehensible.

   Marella reflect it’s time for the SEGA to go back to the 90s, where they were still relevant.

   Marella gives this game 1/5.
   Rating: 1 / 5
3. Zilla Zilla says:

   March 12, 2010 at 1:57 am

   After reading the clear reviews of this game, and a friend suggesting it to me (thanks), I chose to buy it.. and well, it sucks.

   -Spoiler free-

   Graphics and Presentation: 2/10

   Bayonetta’s graphics are as bland and dull as DMC4 (and that game was horrendous). I admit that the cutscenes are pretty awesome and “stylish”, but that doesn’t save the dull character designs and dull hideous stages.

   The enemies honestly, look like they were re-used from Devil May Weep.. same bland demons, well, angels in this case, yeah, you fight ANGELS, which would probably offend any Christian. During the 4th or 5th level nearly every basic character makes there “debut” in the game.. which leads to there be small to no variety in the enemies you fight towards the end of the game, with the exception of boss-fights(which are also bland and dull).

   Voice acting: 6/10

   This game has decent, but stereotypical voice acting, it’s pretty understandable for a Japanese game. Bayonetta(the character) is your typical J-RPG loser with an english accent. Luka, Bayonetta’s like interest(yeah), is an obnoxious American. Theres Rodin some demon guy that uses “Jazzy” shape. Enzo(Joe Pesci-wannabe)is probably my favorite character in the game, and thats pretty unfortunate.. because he has a minor role in the tale.

   All of these characters resemble God Hand rejects.. and nearly have similarities to characters from that game.

   Music: 1/10
   
   The music is BAD pop-based garbage, so terrible I had to mute it.

   Controls: 7/10

   The basic controls are copied directly from the Devil May Weep series. The same double jump, wall jump, etc..

   The combat controls isn’t much different from Devil May Weep(suprised?); One weapon button(Y), one “gun-button”(B), and a shoot button(X). theres a few different command motions for “special moves”, but by and large it’s all DMC, which was a huge let-down for me.. as I despised that series. It would also be nice to have “less anti climatic” interactive finishers, (God of War/God Hand), to keep the combat from getting repetitive.. but that isn’t the case in this game, theres only FEW torture moves.. it’s mainly button mashing or spinning the joystick with dull results. Most of the fights are pointless and just keep you mashing the same buttons repeatly. There are a FEW moments in the game where the gameplay changes completetly.. but those are only for a small cycle of time.

   There doesn’t seem to be a block/defense button in the game, instead you rely on dodging attacks and using “witch-time” which gets repetitive and tedious during boss battles.

   Gameplay: 0/10

   Cutscene – Battle – Cutscene – Boss – Cutscene – Results = Dull.

   Occasionally, you run around these stupid towns.. I’ll just be blatant and say that theres really no reason for these towns to exist.

   Tale: 1/10

   I really have no thought, it seems like the typical J-RPG(or J-Action game, in this case) plot.. a main character that suffers from memory loss, and is mandatory to deal with “wacky” obstacles. Way to be original Platinum sports meeting.

   Replay Regard: 8/10

   This is a game has ALOT of replay regard, but I wouldn’t want to sit owing to this mindless button mashing garbage again.

   By and large: 1/10

   Bayonetta is a dull OVERRATED copy of Devil May Weep with sex-appeal thrown in, it’s all flash and no substance. I reccomend not buying this game(thought there doesn’t seem to be many people buying it anyway), unless you’re a HUGE fan of DMC.. or haven’t played the DMC sports meeting at all. I suggest buying Darksiders, Dante’s inferno, No more Heroes 2.. ANYTHING BUT THIS GAME.
   Rating: 1 / 5
4. Andariel Halo says:

   March 12, 2010 at 4:53 am

   Sorry. If you’re a fan of God of War and God of War clones, don’t bother listening to my review. If you’re apathetic or unsure, then listen, I suppose.

   I’m no expert of this game stylishness at all, having only played a few levels of God of War II and Conan (another GOW clone) and I can say this one was in absolutely no way remarkable in terms of gameplay. It’s the exact same thing—run around rapidly, completely defy physics, and use a messy mix of magic and swords and such, button-mash X or Y to kill everything in your path, button-mash things in concert to do combos and the like.

   Rather than compare it to God of War, which would take up pages and pages, I’ll point out where it’s different.

   There’s a woman as the lead character. She walks around on a very odd angle where her back is slightly arched, giving her butt lots of perk. This serves only the purpose of fanservice. Sure, some sexitude in sports meeting is fun, but when it’s quite literally thrust at us like it’s the main selling point of the game, then it’s really simple to despise the game trying to substitute PG-13 porn for actual quality.

   What makes this game unplayable for me is the visuals. It’s always a excellent thought to be creative with visuals, adding as many stylish flairs and colors as is tastefully possible. This goes way overboard in terms of visuals, to a point where there’s so many colors, lights, and random stuff flying off the girl as she strikes enemies, that I cannot see the enemies. It’s not a case of me being a befuddled ancient twit who can’t handle colors or lights beyond the red, green, pink, and golden-haired of Pac-Man, this is a right catastrophic mess of flair. It’s like that jerkbag in Office Space who wears a bunch of flair on his furnish. It’s like an furnish made of flair.

   It’s just too much. But honestly, it wouldn’t even make a difference—just buttonmash and they’ll go away eventually.

   One excellent thing I can and should say, though—the enemies die with splendid stylishness, where flesh cascade off from bone the more you hack at them, until they fully die.

   But hey—if you like the stylishness, and you’ve never played God of War, certainly try it out!

   Or just wait for God of War III! Excellent God, the timing could not be worse.

   Rather than whine about these other sports meeting, let me list off some other God of War clones upcoming:

   Dante’s Inferno
   
   Lord of the Rings: Conquest
   
   Darksiders
   Rating: 1 / 5
5. Robert Gunther says:

   March 12, 2010 at 5:40 am

   This game is so eerie that the weirdness really takes away from the game play. And I don’t like how you play as the terrible witch killing angles I like to play as the excellent person and be the hero of the day not play some eerie sorta evil character.

   On the other hand the frame tariff and graphics are excellent.
   Rating: 2 / 5